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Lying Lips

He says he wants to change and he will try

For how long will I believe the same worn-out lie?

He says it over and over again, yet, nothing has changed, and I wonder when…

Will I ever learn from the same mistakes?

To see the signs before my heart breaks

I should have seen it right from the start

All along he loved me but with an empty heart

He was a broken human I thought I could fix

I didn’t know I had to put my own life at risk

When you find yourself at the bottom of the ocean

With no more strength to keep on going

Don’t give up, don’t give in

All you have to do is learn how to swim

I was there, broken and destroyed

But he was something else

He was two-faced and paranoid

It didn’t matter if I was wrong or right

All that mattered to him was winning the fight

He couldn’t understand and he couldn’t see

Because he was too busy finding faults in me

Sometimes it felt like I was talking to a wall

Once he heard me cry and felt nothing at all

When I realized what he truly was, it was already too late.

He had put my heart in prison, and there was nowhere to escape.

It looked like I was no longer myself

It felt like I was walking on eggshells

Scared of saying things he thought were wrong

Scared of being punished for something I hadn’t even done

I thought “nobody understands” and suddenly I was all alone

I had no more friends, they all left, one by one.

I had turned into an easy target, all on my own.

By the look on his face, he thought he had won.

I was lonely and full of shame

I could hardly look at myself in the mirror

Because I knew I only had myself to blame

For not being able to see things clearer

For thinking I could turn someone cold into warm

For failing to protect myself from someone

Who only knew how to harm.

I wasn’t paying attention enough

To recognize all the damage he had caused

On my soul, on my body, and on my heart

Not until I started to collect the scattered pieces, part by part.

I realized for far too long, I had let him make me feel

This is what I am worth.

Far too long he had made me think

I deserve to be hurt

It was time to pick up the shields and the swords

Remove all the power of his meaningless words

Now when I am finally free, I can figure out who I truly am.

Brick by brick, I can build myself up again.

With time I will learn how to move on from this,

Although I believed every word from his lying lips.

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